What is love?

Did I literally just have a 5 hour dream about how I completely left you as a friend last year out of nowhere. Wow I really am such a jerk and I don’t even know why I did that thinking you’d get freaked out by the truth when that probably wouldn’t have been the case. I’m so sorry that I did that to you i’ve been so sorry all this time and the guilt has finally caught up with me…as far as I know though you really don’t need me in your life to be happy and knowing how wonderfully smart you are you most likely realized this a long time ago… Just…god i’m a terrible jerk. You can go ahead and not forgive me either because I deserve that. You can also make one of those sarcastic puns you like towards me because I damn well deserve that too. There’s honestly nothing I can think of that would make this situation 100% better and I swear i’m not trying to make anyone feel sorry for me saying that i’m not a jerk or something and trying to defend me because I really don’t deserve that and no one should feel sorry for me. I’ll just say that I hope any kind of pain or confusion i’ve made you feel was taken away by the friends that are obviously much better people than I am… I’m sorry.